Worth a Thousand Words

Yesterday, Ben's daycare sent home a photo that made me stop in my tracks, and if I need to express any one particular thing about Autism, this picture summarizes it perfectly.  It shows so much more about how Autism affects my child than I could ever effectively write or say.

Unfortunately, I can't share it with you.  There are other children in the picture whose parents I don't know, and I do not feel comfortable showing their photos here, because I would be a bit ticked if perfect strangers put my kid on their blog.  You know, do unto others and stuff.  And I can't crop them out because they are crucial elements in the picture.  Without them, the difference isn't there.  So, we are all just going to have to make do with whatever words I can scrounge up to describe a picture that most accurately illustrates Autism that I can't show you but need to share with you.  Irony, anyone?  Or is it not ironic, but just confusing?

At any rate, imagine in your mind fourteen five-year-olds dressed in florescent daycare shirts all posed around an inflatable pumpkin at the pumpkin patch.  They have been told that this picture is a souvenir of their field trip for their parents, and everybody stop picking your nose and say cheese.  Thirteen of those children are smiling brightly, showing all their teeth.  One of those children has that "Who farted?" expression.

Then there is Ben.  Ben is in the middle of everything, wearing the same shirt, sitting right in front of the inflatable pumpkin, with kids on either side of him and slightly in front.  He is not looking at the camera.  He is sitting sideways.  He is not looking at anyone but is instead contemplating something he is holding in his hand, perhaps a leaf or piece of hay.

He is with the others but separate from them, all at the same time.  He is in his own world right in the middle of theirs.

This is what Autism does.  This is what Autism looks like, at least from my experience.

Actually, there was a time a few years ago when he wouldn't have even been in the picture.   He wouldn't have been able to tolerate sitting so close to other kids, though he has always been affectionate with us and has sat with us.  This shows improvement, and I am thankful for it, but the difference and the struggle are so evident in this picture that I tear up when I see it.

What I hope you will take away from this little experience of mine is that Ben doesn't want to be alone, but because of this syndrome, he just is.  He is separate, apart, and different, but if someone takes the time to make the effort required to enter his world, he is well worth it.  I promise.

Please reach out to children with Autism and please teach your children to reach out to children with Autism or any kind of difference, instead of just ridiculing or ignoring them.  They are worth it.  I promise.